Download Ebook Staying in Love Participant's Guide: Falling in Love Is Easy, Staying in Love Requires a Plan, by Andy Stanley
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Staying in Love Participant's Guide: Falling in Love Is Easy, Staying in Love Requires a Plan, by Andy Stanley
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From the Back Cover
'We all know what's required to fall in love .... a pulse. Falling in love is easy. But staying there, that's something else entirely. With more than a thousand matchmaker services in business, and new ones springing up all the time, finding someone is easier than ever. But staying together with the one you've found seems to get more difficult daily.staying together with the one you've found seems to be the real challenge.So, is it possible for two people to fall in love and actually stay there? Absolutely! Learn how in pastor and author Andy Stanley's four-session group study Staying in Love. This Staying in Love Participant's Guide is designed to be used with the Staying in Love video. Session titles include:1. The Juno Dilemma2. Re-Modeling3. Feelin' It4. Multiple Choice Marriage'
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About the Author
Communicator, author, and pastor Andy Stanley founded Atlanta-based North Point Ministries in 1995. Today, NPM consists of six churches in the Atlanta area and a network of more than 90 churches around the globe that collectively serve nearly 185,000 people weekly. As host of Your Move with Andy Stanley, which delivers over seven million messages each month through television and podcasts, and author of more than 20 books, including The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating; Ask It; How to Be Rich; Deep & Wide; and Irresistible, he is considered one of the most influential pastors in America. Andy and his wife, Sandra, have three grown children and live near Atlanta.
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Product details
Paperback: 80 pages
Publisher: Zondervan; Participant's Guide ed. edition (September 1, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 031040861X
ISBN-13: 978-0310408611
Product Dimensions:
6 x 0.2 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 2.9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.7 out of 5 stars
542 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#286,041 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I'm a grown (divorced) man and watched Pastor Andy Stanley's sermons based on this book, then I bought the book and read it. My intention was to see if it addressed the many mistakes my friends and I made, and to see it it was good enough to give to younger friends and family members.Having never received "the talk," I feel this short, easy-to-read book provides far more information in a clear, concise, no-nonsense format than any ten minute talk my father could have given me.The life principles Andy teaches are brilliant in their simplicity. The book has Christian overtones, but the information can be applied in anyone's life regardless of religious beliefs and age.I would highly recommend buying this book for your kids when they are junior high school age or more. Ideally, the children and parent(s) should both read it and discuss it. Some of the concepts require a little more maturity to understand, so the children should simply put the book on a shelf and read it (and discuss it) once a year until they understand the information.This book is also excellent for older single and divorced men and women, who have made some relationship mistakes, want a fresh start, and wish to avoid making as many relationship mistakes as possible.I highly recommend this book. It can change your life and save you or your children from making some fairly basic and completely avoidable relationship mistakes.
Buy this book. Read it. Single or not, you will be glad you did.Life has become increasingly complicated in the new millennium, in part, because American culture has thrown out “the rule bookâ€. Some blame the pill; some blame the feminists; some blame the media. Whatever the reason, the irony is that the emotional and financial costs of broken relationships have never been higher.In his new book, The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating, Andy Stanley writes:“I’m not all that interested in why things are the way they are. I’m more interested in helping you navigate the way things are. My purpose in writing is to increase your relational satisfaction†(14).Fair enough. But then Stanley then goes on to offer a rather rare insight:“I’ve met with many struggling married couples who would describe themselves as having ‘marriage problems.’ But in all my years I’ve never talked to a married couple that actually had a marriage problem. What I have discovered is that people with problems get married and their problems collide. What was manageable as a single person eventually becomes unmanageable within the context of marriage†(20).Wow. This is getting down to brass tacks! Instead of looking for that perfect person to solve all your problems, Stanley says—hey, look in the mirror![1]Andy Stanley is a pastor who does not sound or write like a pastor. He describes himself as a communicator, author, and pastor and founder of North Point Ministries in Atlanta, Georgia. His book is written in 10 chapters, including:1. The Right Person Myth;2. Commitment is Overrated;3. Becoming the Right Person;4. So Becoming;5. Love Is;6. Gentleman’s Club;7. The Way Forward;8. The Talk;9. Designer Sex; and10. If I were You (7-8).These chapters are preceded by acknowledgments and an introduction. They are followed by conclusions, notes, and a small group discussion guide. A DVD video study is also available.This is a book filled with a lot of wisdom. For example, Stanley’s discussion of 1 Corinthians 13 in chapter 5 is priceless—he describes it as your list of suggestions on becoming the person that you would want to meet (76). One item on this list is patience: Love is patient (1 Cor 13:4). Stanley notes that impatience is an emotion, not a decision, and it does not come naturally. We all have a natural pace and get angry when others don’t go along. Stanley explains that love means deferring to someone else to set the pace—in time, space, and margin just as much as they need (79).The cliff notes version of Stanley’s advice is found in chapter 10 which he describes as the “hard sellâ€.Stanley knows his audience. He starts this chapter by repeating a challenge that he made earlier: “Beginning today, take a year off from all romantic and sexual pursuits†(170). This is the hard sell part. Psychiatrists tell us that addictions are forever—abstinence is the only prescription that truly works. Bad habits take two weeks to break—bad sexual habits fall somewhere in-between. While this might sound like a high price to pay for moral clarity, but the life you save may be your own[2].Stanley suggests that you spend this year proactively doing some important things to become the sort of person that the person you want to meet would find attractive. He has 5 suggestions:1. Address your past—face up to your issues;2. Break some bad habits (substance abuse, bad attitudes, poor fashion choices…);3. Set some standards—how far is too far?4. Get out of Debt—don’t expect to dump debt on a potential spouse; and5. Go (back) to church—hang out in the right place (172).Remember the mirror mentioned earlier? You cannot change someone else but you can work on becoming someone they might actually want to get to know.This is not a preachy book, but it is an in-your-face book. Although my wife, Maryam, and I have been married for 30 years, I was already 30 when I got married. This implies that I was single for a long time. Reading Stanley’s book back then would have saved me a lot of pain. Go for it. Read it. Take it seriously. Save yourself a lot of pain.[1] Stanley writes: “ever purchase something from a big box retailer and open the box to find a card that reads something along these lines? If this product is defective or a piece is missing, do not return to the place of purchase. Instead, contact us at 1-800-ITS-YOUR-FAULT.†(59)[2] The leading cause of suicide among young people is a broken relationship.
There are a couple of topics I absolutely HATE hearing sermons on. One is marriage (primarily because I'm single and intend to stay that way) and the other is money.I've heard many sermons on the topic of stewardship, and most of the time, I cringe inwardly the entire time. I've even read a few books on stewardship. I've found that most Christian pastors and authors approach stewardship in one of two ways.First, there is the Prosperity Gospel camp. These folks typically say that God wants all His children to be rich and that financial blessings are the primary way God blesses faithfulness. In my opinion, this teaching doesn't square with the whole of Scripture, especially the teachings of Jesus Himself. It reduces God to a genie. If you send in a large enough donation, pray the right prayer, or claim the right verse, then God has no choice but to bless you financially. If you are poor, it's your own fault because your faith is too weak and you aren't trusting God to provide. Proponents of the Prosperity Gospel also frequently twist Scripture and quote it out of context.On the opposite end of the spectrum are those who try to use guilt and intimidation in regards to stewardship. People of this persuation usally put a lot of emphasis on tithing (giving God the top 10%) and frequently quote Malachi 3:8. It is implied (and sometimes directly stated) that believers who don't tithe are robbing God. If you are bold enough to question, why you should tithe, you will probably not get a straight answer. You will probably just be told the Bible commands it and that's it. But in my opinion, it's not quite that simple. I believe that it is possible for someone to tithe regularly out of less than pure motives. It can lead to legalism. Just because a person tithes doesn't necessarily mean a person has a right attitude and heart towards money. There are many non-believers who are far more generous with their money than a lot of Christians. It's sad, but true.This book manages to avoid both of these pitfalls. Andy Stanley is definitely NOT a prosperity preacher. But he also doesn't restore to guilt-trips to motivate people to give. Instead, he focuses on an issue that is almost completely neglected when it comes to finances. Fear. Andy Stanley asserts (and I completely agree) that the main reason many (if not most) Christians don't give generously isn't pride or selfishness, but fear. In this current econonmy, many people are struggling to afford essentials like food, rent, and gas. They are just barely able to make ends meet as it is. It seems impossible and unfair to be expected to give when you can barely afford the true necessities. I can't speak for anyone else, but I know this is very true in my case. I often feel torn. I want to be generous and give, but I feel like I can't because I can't afford my own apartment, groceries, or a car, gas and insurance. I am living paycheck to paycheck, with very little left over.But rather than emphasizing the importance of the tithe, the basis for Andy Stanley's teaching is found in another portion of Scripture all together. It is found in 2nd Corinthians 9:7 (NIV) Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.The Lord has definitely been stretching me in the area of giving and stewardship. He has been challenging me to step out of my comfort zone. He has also challenged me to change my attitude and thinking in regards to money and how I spend it. This is an area where I really struggle. But I know I am not alone. I think there are many Christians who struggle in the area of finances. But they are afraid to speak up.Guilt will only motivate people to give for so long. Eventually, they will get fed up and just say forget it. A person who truly wants to be generous must allow God to truly change their heart and attitude towars money. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen if they allow God to truly transform their heart and mind.I highly recommend this book to anyone who is new to the subject to stewardship or to anyone who is fed up with the two extremes I mentioned above. I also recommend any of the other books by Andy Stanley. He writes in a way that is convicting and thought-provoking, yet practical and easy to understand.
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